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Legs Were Broken!

It has totally been a Slacker Saturday today!  In my defense, I have been recruiting my energies for tonight’s performance of Morning’s at Seven at Ilion Little Theatre, which opened last night.  At least one of my loyal readers is interested in knowing how things went (Hello, Granny K!), so here it is:


Just felt like being dramatic (SO appropriate for a drama queen like me!).  But I will say that after the usual opening night jitters, the first performance went very well.  The audience seemed to enjoy it immensely, and we got some very kind compliments afterward.

Don’t we look about to kick some community theatre butt?

First we had to take the traditional pre-performance cast selfie.  At least, that is Kaylynn’s tradition.  She is the beautiful lady in the immediate foreground.  I have worked with her on other plays and murder mysteries, and she is always such a joy.  While I’m at it, I must give a shout-out to the entire cast and crew.  Oh, you don’t really want me to put everyone’s name, do you?  This isn’t an Oscar speech, after all.  Come see the show, and you can read all about us in the programme (the computer is underlining “programme,” but I wanted to give it the pretentious spelling) (and not for nothing, but why is is “pretentious” and not “pretencious” when it is “pretence”?  I mean, I can see why it is not “predendous” from “pretend,” because that would be silly) (But I digress).

I suppose some readers might want to hear a little more about last night’s performance.  Well, I will confess right off the bat that I messed up.  Almost big time.  First I forgot the end of a line, which my cast-mate needed to give her line.  Then I started to skip almost a whole page of necessary information.  In both instances, I caught myself and disaster was averted. I was, however, quite mortified.  For one reason, I am good at learning lines and am often the one to save others who find themselves in difficulties.  For another reason, THAT WAS THE SCENE I KNEW BEST!!!  I suppose I needed to look over my lines a few more times. 5,483 times is obviously superior to 5,479 times.  Let that be a lesson to me.

However, as I said, the audience seemed to enjoy the performance a lot. They were a wonderful audience: ready to laugh and be pleased.  I tell you, there is nothing better than being on stage and hearing sincere laughter.  I guess not so much if you are doing, for example, a Shakespearean tragedy, but this is a charming comedy.  And I believe the entire cast was charming.  I encourage local readers to come and see for yourselves.  Tell them Mohawk Valley Girl sent you.  And if I steered you wrong, feel free to break my leg.



Break a Lame Leg, Me

I just posted on Facebook that I am brain dead.  This is no way to be on opening night for Morning’s at Seven at Ilion Little Theatre.

Oh for heavens’ sake, can’t I even manage a Friday Lame Post?

It is a dramatic moment.

When in doubt, throw in a picture.  Usually I use a picture of a monster, but here is a shot from last night’s dress rehearsal, used without permission.  I don’t think the lady that took it will mind, but I will ask her when I see her tonight.  This is the whole cast.  We are only all on stage a few times in the play, which is just as well, because Ilion Little Theatre’s stage is small.  The whole theatre is small, although I prefer to call it cozy and intimate.

The fatty upper arm in the foreground on the left is mine.

Here is a backstage shot from last night, showing us getting ready and frantically studying our scripts.  I have not frantically studied my script today, but I have time.  Perhaps I have allowed myself a little too much time.  I took a half a vacation day at work so I would have time for a nap.  I had a nice long one which I enjoyed very much.  Then I had a cup of coffee, which I also enjoyed very much.  I have been dithering ever since.

However, at least I made my blog post, such as it is.  Local readers may like to come see the show.  It is April 26, 27, and 28, and May 3, 4 and 5, 7:30 p.m. Fridays and Saturdays, 2 p.m. Sundays, doors open a half hour before curtain.  Tickets are available at the door (till sold out, dare I hope?) or through the website,

I Should Be a Movie Star

Why would I not have a Lame Post Friday?  It’s opening night of Steel Magnolias!  I have other things on my mind!  Will I remember everything?  I’m not talking about my lines (although it would be good if I remembered all of those too), but what about my costume pieces, props, ooh, and my contact lenses?  Will my hair stay on?

Ah, you think that last one was a joke?  Alas, no.  In the first scene I have to wear some fake hair, so that in the second scene when Truvy calls attention to my new short hair-do, it makes sense.  I meant to write a whole, humorous blog post about my hair troubles, but I’m afraid if I tried to do it now, it would just make me upset (is that a run-on sentence?  I usually know these things, but I am flustered).

Yes,  I have opening night jitters.  The closer it gets to time to go to the theatre, the more jittery I feel.  This is completely natural.  I bet even Tony award winning actors feel this way.  I say Tony not Oscar, because I can’t imagine movies give you the same jitters.  Just do another take! It is really no wonder that many people feel the stage is real acting and movies are not. Now don’t start defending movies to me!  I love movies!  Of course it is real acting (well, some of it is and some of it sucks, we won’t get into that).  But that lots of takes thing really has my envy tonight.

I’m sure everything will go fine.  And if it does not, well, that is the excitement of live theatre. I’m sure enough will go well to entertain our audience (sometime they are entertained by the mistakes, but we prefer to avoid going that route.  I will probably mention it tomorrow, when I make my Scattered Saturday blog post about how I was too tired after Opening Night to do much of anything.  Happy Friday, everyone.

For local, theatre-going readers,  that’s Steel Magnolias at Ilion Little Theatre, Remington Ave., Ilion, NY, March 3, 4, 10 and 11 at 8 pm., 5 and 12 at 2 p.m.  For more information, visit or go to their Facebook page.


Shall We Split the Difference?

I am missing the monthly dinner meeting of Ilion Little Theatre Club.

OK, I just sat here with my laptop for what seemed like a long time before I typed in the above sentence.  Then I backspaced it out.  Then I hit “undo” and put it back.  Then I sat here and tried to think of another sentence.  As you can see, it is not going well.

In my defense, I have not had a post that was purely about How I Can’t Write a Decent Post Today (I just added the word “decent” to that phrase, do you like it?) in a long time.  I’m not saying all my posts were decent, and I certainly added in enough whiny excuses for why they weren’t as good as I wished they were.  Still, how long has it been since I posted pure foolishness?  I’m too lazy to click back to my dashboard and check.

Tomorrow night is opening for Splitting Issues by Sam Bobrick.  We had our dress rehearsal last night.  It went pretty well.  I was glad.  I don’t like to invoke that old saw that the worse a dress rehearsal the better the opening night.  I don’t want an opening night miracle, meaning I don’t want to NEED an opening night miracle!  Well, we don’t in this case.  The show is good.  I think the audience will get a lot of laughs.

Well, there you go.  This post was not pure foolishness; I gave another plug to Splitting Issues at Ilion Little Theatre.  That’s Friday and Saturday, Oct. 21 and 22 at 8 p.m., Sunday, Oct. 23 at 2 p.m., at The Stables, 13 Remington Ave., Ilion, NY.   Tickets available at or at the door.

As for this post, I think I’ll slap on a silly headline and call it a Non-Sequitur Thursday.



But I’m Not the Star!

I was going to call today’s post “A Big Night at the Little Theatre,”  after a work friend said it to me.  Then I thought it has probably been used many, many times.  They do say plagiarism is the sincerest form of flattery, oh wait, I say that.  I’m not given to flattery.  And I don’t need anybody to flatter me, either! (Oh yeah, like anybody is inclined to).

Where was I?  Ah yes, opening night of Lunch Hour, the first production of Ilion Little Theatre’s 2015-16 season.  As you may recall, I am stage manager.   I composed a blog post in my battered spiral notebook while on lunch at work, hoping to lighten my load in the evening. Um, that’s right now, as I am typing it in and making a LOT of changes, including the headline.

While I worked, I made myself flustered planning what I HAVE to get done, thinking wistfully about the things I would LIKE to get done, and wondering what on earth I was going to wear.  At least the last consideration has been taken care of.

Now, just stop shaking your head and giving me THAT look (I hate it when people give me that look!).  It is not as vain and frivolous as it may appear (that is not to say that I am not vain and frivolous, but that is not the topic of this blog post).  I really have very few wearable outfits at present.  I seem to have a lot of clothes, but most of them fall into categories like Don’t Fit Anymore, Not Appropriate, Not Comfortable, What The Hell Was I Thinking When I Bought That, and Dirty.  Some items fit more than one category, as you may imagine.

But never mind about me.  The play is going very well.  We had an excellent dress rehearsal last night, marred only by a bat episode, which I will perhaps describe at further length on Scattered Saturday.

Today’s post must be short.  I have a lot more dithering to do.

Local readers may like to come see the play at Ilion Little Theatre, Remington Avenue, Ilion, NY.   Performances are November 6, 7, 13 and 14 at 8 p.m., 8 and 15 at 2 p.m.  For more information you can visit, and/or Like their Facebook page.


Lame Actor’s Nightmare

We interrupt All Roxy All The Time to bring you Lame Post Friday.  I thought all week about beginning a blog post that way.  Is it the thrill I was hoping for?  Hard to say.  In any case, it is opening night, how can I not talk about Roxy ?

Dress rehearsal last night went pretty good.  Then I had a dream that it was dress rehearsal again and people were walking out.  In the dream, one of the walkers said, “I was sitting there being bored, when I thought, I can just go home.”  I guess this is my new actor’s nightmare.  Of course the traditional actor’s nightmare is about being on stage and not knowing anything about the play, but you know me.  I just have to be different.

In fact, I stopped having the traditional actor’s nightmare many years ago, when we had our company, Murder For Hire.  We did interactive murder mysteries.  A large portion of these mysteries was mingling with the audience.  There was also a question and answer period.  You get a lot of practice staying in character and thinking on your feet.  I loved it.  I soon found that I would still have the dream about being on stage in an unknown play, but it no longer bothered me.  In the dream, I would just start talking.

I have every expectation that tonight’s performance will go very well.  I have very little worry that anybody will walk out, although I suppose anything can happen.  I intend to break a leg, but not literally.  I’ll report back on Saturday.



The Post I Should Have Made Friday

I am in full wrist-to-forehead mode. I have a headache, I keep forgetting what time I have to be at the theatre, I have to clean my upstairs and organize laundry, and I can’t think of what to write for a blog post.

I do have one shout-out to a local business. Friday, regular readers will recall, was opening night of Busybody, the play I am in with Ilion Little Theatre. I had rehearsal the night before but had gotten up at 3:30 that morning to work overtime. I got home from work before four, planning to nap till 5:30 or so. I found a note from my husband: “Honey- If at all possible, please don’t take a nap or your shower before 4:30. You will find out why. Love, Steve”

At first I was not best pleased. I had my schedule planned! Why was he messing with a nervous leading lady on opening night? Then I realized: it’s got to be something good. What sweet thing had my husband planned? And how could I modify my schedule to accommodate?

I ate some food. This was actually better. Obviously I had to have fuel in my body for the show, but it is a mistake to eat too much too close to curtain. This would work. And it didn’t take long. What else could I do? I turned on the computer, checked my Facebook notifications and email, then logged onto WordPress. And realized I was much too flustered to come up with a post.

Around twenty after four the phone rang. The caller ID said “Flowers by Suzanne.” So that was it! The nice lady on the phone asked said she had some flowers to deliver but wanted to make sure I was there, because it was much too cold to leave flowers outside.

Soon I was opening the door to the nice lady and a lovely basket of flowers. My schnoodle Tabby ran out to greet her, too. She may have gotten a little too friendly while I was admiring the flowers, but I got her back into the house eventually. The flowers smelled wonderful. I was delighted.

I still had time for nap, shower, and more butterflies before opening night, which I have already told you went well. And making this blog post has alleviated just a few of my butterflies for today. Once again, Busybody is at Ilion Little Theatre, 13 Remington Ave., Ilion, NY, today and Feb. 8 at 2 p.m., Feb. 6 and 7 at 8 p.m.

Flowers by Suzanne is located at 433 Mohawk St., Herkimer, NY, phone number 315-866-0206. Their website is

Ambiance by Suzanne

Just a quick plug for a local business today. I may have mentioned I am in a play with Ilion Little Theatre this weekend and next. There are a number of new people in the cast, new to ILT and new to any stage. I thought I would do something special for opening night.

I remember years ago in high school, people giving their friends flowers for opening night. My mother told me the leading lady got roses, that was all. In fact, she gave me two lovely roses when I was a leading lady once, but that is another memory. I know in movies where they show plays, somebody hands the leading lady a bouquet of roses while she takes her final bow, but I’ve never seen that in real life.

Be all that as it may, I thought to get everyone in the cast as well as the accompanist and sound/lights guy a single bloom. I realized carnations were more in my budget than roses. Anyways, they last longer. I made a phone call.

I drive by Flowers by Suzanne on Mohawk Street in Herkimer, NY almost every day on my way home from work. Steven got me some lovely roses from them one Valentine’s Day (I guess I’m his leading lady) (sorry, had to say it). I ordered eleven carnations, in yellow if possible (there is something in the play about goldenrod, so I thought yellow carnations was close enough).

Friday after work I picked them up. As I walked to the door of the business I got a wonderful whiff of lilacs from a big bush nearby. I must plant some lilacs in my yard. The nice people at Suzanne’s were able to accommodate my request for all yellow and even threw in an extra, in case something happened to one. I grabbed a handful of little cards to write something nice on and was on my way.

As I sat in the car waiting for Steven (I had to pick him up at work), I wrote the cards. And realized I had miscalculated. One card short. I had been going down the cast list writing the cards, so the accompanist got shorted. I had the right number of little envelopes, so I wrote a note on a small piece of notebook paper. It turned out to be OK with the recipient, as it turns out. I had written “Well, this is embarrassing” on the outside of the notebook paper after I had folded it in half. She was highly amused

People were very pleased with their flowers, and I felt I had added to the ambiance of opening night. Anyone needing to add ambiance to any of their occasions can happily go to Flowers by Suzanne. They are located at 433 Mohawk St., Herkimer, NY, 315-866-0206.