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I Feel Like a Monster

It was going to be another Monstrous Monday.  I found some monster pictures in my Media Library, I wrote some foolish comments about them. I was just finishing up and ready to think up a title and hit publish when I remembered:  It isn’t Monday!  It’s Tuesday!  This is what happens when you don’t go to work on Monday.  It messes up your head.  It doesn’t help that I’m not feeling well (my ostensible reason for taking a Monstrous Monday).  In fact, my stomach is starting to roil as I type.  I’m just going to slap a headline on this, hit publish and stretch out.  Here is what I typed in when I thought it was Monday:

I’m afraid it is going to be another Monstrous Monday.  Both Steven and I seem to be down with some 24-hour (I hope) bugaboo. But I shall not go on about our health woes. For one reason, it would be a HIPAA violation.  For another reason, it is boring and a little disgusting.  Never mind, let’s find a picture of a monster to share.

Raise your hand if you think these Monster Monday posts are silly!

I couldn’t find a new picture so I went to my Media Library and found one of Frankenstein’s monster I haven’t used recently (I hope).

He’s been hanging around for a while now.

Here is a friendlier monster.  My husband Steven got me this nice vampire for Christmas some years ago. He’s been hanging in our living room ever since.  As regular readers know, I like to make Halloween last all year.

This plant required a red thumb, not green one.

Oh, here’s a picture I haven’t used more than once, I don’t think.  It is from Roger Corman’s Little Shop of Horrors (1960).  I confess to not being a fan of the musical, but I LOVE the cheesy black-and-white horror flick.

So say I.

I end with how I feel:  tired and ready to say good night!  Full disclosure:  I probably won’t go to bed for a while yet, because I don’t want to wake up at 2 a.m. unable to get back to sleep.  You know how it is.  I’m afraid this has been a foolish post.  We’ll call it a blogger’s sick day and drive on.

 

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I Like a Semi-Colon on Lame Post Friday

Oh crap, it is almost 10:30 at night and I have not yet made my Friday Lame Post.  Can I make it before midnight?  A more practical question is, why am I up so far past my bedtime?  Well, I just got back from A Bad Year for Tomatoes at Ilion Little Theatre.  I think I can write a quick post while I sip a glass of wine with my husband.  What, you thought I wasn’t going to have a glass of wine on a Friday?  I don’t think anybody thought that.

Normally when I have someplace to go on a Friday, I try to make my blog post first. I did not do so today, because I was working on Spring Into Murder, the murder mystery we are putting on for Morning Star Methodist Church in Ilion on April 28.  Earlier today I saw a flier about said murder mystery, so I was all psyched up to get what I have typed into the computer so I can get it out to the cast and we can start rehearsals.  I’m getting there!  Oh, you think I should have had it completed, typed in, polished, and have started rehearsals already?  That would have been nice.  But this is me we’re talking about.

Oh dear, two paragraphs into the blog post and I’ve got the type-it-in-backspace-it-out disease.  Part of me is saying, “You’re over 200 words; that’s plenty for Lame Post Friday!”  Yes, the voices in my head use semi-colons when they talk.  The voices in my head are all about grammar and punctuation.  If anybody would like to comment below, pointing out any errors I may have made today, go right ahead.  I will only laugh, because I have forgotten more grammar than most folks ever knew.  The rest I willfully ignore as it suits my purpose (insert evil laugh here).

In the meantime, I think I need to hit Publish, finish my wine, and go to bed.  I hope to see you all tomorrow on Scattered Saturday or perhaps Slacker Saturday, whatever it turns out to be.

 

Most of the Time, I’m a Regular Fool

So I guess my stomach problems yesterday were not purely nerves.  At least, I seemed OK during the murder mystery (which was a blast, by the way) and not bad this morning, but as soon as I ate something… well, these things happen, I suppose.  I really hate to make another blog post whining about my petty health complaints. I will try not to whine but merely state the facts.  Then again, it is Wrist to Forehead Sunday.  Perhaps a “woe is me” followed by a swoon is appropriate.

Most of the audience seemed to really enjoy Secrets at Suiter House, our murder mystery, last night.  Now I must rush headlong into the next, Spring into Murder.  I’ll have more blog posts about that, no doubt.  Theatre is my life!  Part of my life, anyways.

I had a very nice Easter dinner with some members of my family.  My stomach allowed me to partake of ham, cheesy potatoes, and Heidelberg rolls, among other treats.  I admit it: I am rarely too ill to eat.  I keep thinking if I eat the right thing, it will make me feel better.  This explains my continued failure to meet my weight-loss goals.

However, as I often say, tomorrow is another day.  I guess a lot of people have said that.  How embarrassing to resort to cliche.  Well, what do you people expect of me when I have a bad stomach on Wrist to Forehead Sunday?  I can’t be profound under these circumstances!  But apparently I can make a blog post, however foolish.  Hey, I just remembered something else:  it’s April Fool’s Day.  That’s it!  I’m just an April fool.  Happy Easter, everybody.

 

 

Well! It’s Another Monstrous Monday!

I think Monstrous Monday is going to be a regular thing here, and I think many people can identify with the sentiment.

A common sentiment, am I right?

I know, I KNOW, I must plan ahead and write blog posts in advance.  Well, some readers enjoy my silly posts about not being able to write a post, so there.  Still, you can get too much of a good thing. Isn’t there some saying about going to the well too many times? I try to avoid such cliches, but I do say “well” a lot.

Be that as it may, on with the blog post.  I wrote a very little on the next murder mystery, Spring into Murder, but am not making much progress in finding a complete cast. I thought everybody wanted to act!  Oh well, I guess not everybody (see, there I go with “well” again).

I act, with gestures!

Speaking of everybody wanting to act, here is a picture of me acting up a storm in last summer’s The Tempest with LiFT Theatre Company.  That was one of my big, dramatic scenes. OK, I am big and dramatic in all of my scenes, in real life as well as on stage.  I always say, go with your strengths (I suppose that is a cliche.  Oh well!).

A graphic depiction of how I feel about my continued inability to write a decent blog post.

I swerve into non-sequitur territory with a picture of fake poo.  These were props from one of last year’s murder mysteries, He Laughed Himself to Death.  I have long been an aficionado of fake poo.

And now I am over 250 words, which as regular readers (if any remain) know, I consider respectable.  I return to my Monstrous Monday and, as always, hope for a better blog post tomorrow.

 

More Murder and Mayhem!

I believe I have mentioned that I have another murder mystery to write.  I may also have mentioned (once or twice) that I have been having trouble writing ANYTHING lately.  Well, just now I surprised myself.  I wrote a brief overview of said mystery, to send to the venue for publicity purposes.  The venue is Morning Star Methodist Church in Ilion, NY, and the performance date is Saturday, April 28, 2018.  They are serving a roast pork dinner, which was quite delicious when we performed there last year and the year before.

So I have been writing this mystery in bits and pieces, and second guessing myself about everything.  I tried writing the overview twice on breaks at work today, to no avail.  Finally I sat down at my laptop and said, “Well, I’ve got to do this now.”  And here is what I wrote:

Spring into Murder takes place at the kick-off dinner for the Tulip Festival sponsored by Two Lips Cosmetics. The founder and CEO of the company loves everything to do with The Netherlands, so much so that she changed her first name to Holland and hired a bodyguard named Dutch. On the agenda for tonight is the unveiling of the spring line of lipstick colors, to be modeled by Holland’s spokesmodel and partner, the beautiful Ariel Angelica. Holland is accompanied by her new husband, Rod. Also on hand are Holland’s nephew Benedict and recently adopted daughter Windy, as well as the designer of this year’s colors, the brilliant if eccentric Giselle Ellison.

Unfortunately, all is not beauty and harmony at Two Lips Cosmetics. Rumor has it that Holland did not want to take on Ariel as a partner, that Benedict wanted Windy to be the spokesmodel, that Giselle feels badly paid for her work, and nobody knows quite what to think of Dutch. Additionally, we don’t know who sent Ariel a bouquet of BLACK tulips!
There may be murder before the night is out! Who will solve the crime?

I was rather pleased with it myself.  The new husband got his name as I wrote it, and Giselle Ellison (my part) changed from a dedicated secretary to a lipstick designer.  I think diva is much more fun than downtrodden.

Having written that much, I feel fired up to get the whole thing done.  I’ll share more information about the performance — times and prices — when I know more.

 

A Blog to No Where

Can my readers bear yet another post about How I Can’t Write a Post Today.  I can’t write ANYTHING today!  And it has been that way for a very long time.

OK, that is an exaggeration.  I can write something.  Here I am, typing in nonsense I intend to pass off as a blog post.  Sunday I wrote two articles to submit to Mohawk Valley Living magazine.  I wonder if they were any good.  I can’t worry about that now.  Where was I?  Nowhere, it seems.

Now I am sitting here staring at the word “nowhere.”  My computer is not underlining it, but it looks wrong.  Like it really says “now here.”  These are the things that keep me from moving on to the next paragraph.

The next project I am dithering about is the murder mystery for Morning Star Methodist Church in Ilion, NY, planned for Saturday, April 28.  I think I have a situation, and the names of some of the characters.  I have a victim but not yet a murderer.  This is not uncommon.  Sometimes I write the whole script before I decide whodunnit.  You can do that with a ten-page script.  I wouldn’t try it with a 300-page novel.  No, I have not written a 300-page novel, but I have written 300 pages on a novel.  At least a couple of times.

And now I have written a 200 word blog post.  It looks kind of sad without any pictures of monsters.  Maybe I could include just one.

“Where have you been all my life?”

There you go:  a monster and a beautiful girl.  What’s not to like?  Oh, I’m sure somebody could find something. Once again, I’ll try for a better blog post tomorrow.

 

A Monstrous Monday

I am sitting on my couch, laptop on my lap (good place for it), typing in words and backspacing them out.  This is not a good start to my blogging week.  Darn it, I’m tired!  I had a marvelous time at the Crusader’s Wine Tasting yesterday, and I worked ten hours today, got my articles for next month’s Mohawk Valley Living magazine submitted…  OK, I have no excuse.  Well, this is going to be a Monday Mental Meanderings post.  Maybe I should add a few monsters.  As regular readers know, I like monsters.

“Is this where the water aerobics class meets?”

I haven’t shared the Creature from the Black Lagoon in a while.  I think it’s kind of sad he doesn’t have a real name.  Do you suppose his friends call him Blackie?  Maybe ‘Goon?  Or Creach?  These are the things I think about when I am supposed to be writing a blog post.

“I told him not to lose his head.”

As I was searching my Media Library for Creach, I noticed this lovely shot of Peter Lorre and Vincent Price.  I decided to include it under the contention that people are the real monsters.  That is definitely an argument one can make.  In fact, as I typed that in, I overheard somebody on Snapped call the murderess a monster.  I would really like to finish this blog post so I can watch the next episode of that show, by the way.

Did she reach her breaking point? Or is she just a monster?